The Cobbler's Kid

Getting a hair cut around my house isn’t as easy as one would think. Actually it can be quite difficult. I feel kind of like the cobbler’s kids who were always in need of new shoes. It always seems like I’m always in need of a haircut. You wouldn’t think that would you? Given the fact that my wife is a professionally trained hair stylist. Anyway, every time I need a haircut, Kathy and I have this little exercise that we seem to go through. Here’s a sample of what it’s like.

Ron: “I sure do need a haircut.”
Kathy: “Well, just come in to the shop and I’ll give you one.”
Ron: “But why can’t you just do here at the house?”
Kathy: “Because, I don’t like cut hair at the house. It’s just easier for me to do at the shop. I like the separation between work and home. Besides if I start cutting hair at the house, everyone will think they can get it cut at the house too. You don’t want everyone coming over in the evenings for haircuts do you?”
Ron: “But no one needs to know. It will be our little secret.”
Kathy: “Nope.”
Ron: “But you used to.”
Kathy: “Yeah….that was before I was working and had no where else to cut it.”
Ron: “But I’m your husband”
Kathy: “So?”
Ron: “Don’t I deserve some type of ‘special treatment’?”
Kathy: “Wouldn’t not having to pay for a haircut for the last 20 years be considered ‘special treatment’?”
Ron: “Well I may not pay in money but it’s costing me a life time.”
Kathy: “What did you say?”
Ron: “Nothing…it’s just that I don’t like having to come in the shop like everyone else”
Kathy: “Like everyone else? Why? Do you think you’re special?”
Ron: “No, not in that way but I am your husband. You should be able to cut my hair whenever I want you to.”
Kathy: “Whenever you want? What do think this is…Haircuts on Demand? Let me tell you something mister. I’m not your personal hair stylist. I’m your wife who just happens to cut hair. I wasn’t put here on earth just to cut your hair. It’s this simple; if you want your hair cut you will come into the shop like everyone else and I’ll cut it there! If you don’t like it then you can go somewhere else! You got that?"
Ron: “But, I…”
Kathy: “I’m serious – It wouldn’t bother me if I ever cut your hair again. You’re actually my worst customer. You always act like a baby. You’re constantly moving and you’re always complaining about something once you get in ‘my chair’. Go somewhere else, see if I care. Besides you’re a lousy tipper!”

Long pause where Ron contemplates his options...

Ron: “So when do you want me to come in?”
Kathy: “Tomorrow night at 6:00 and don’t be late, cause you’re taking me out to dinner afterwards .”
Ron: “Crap”