Closer To Home

Last night as I was driving, I suddenly realized that I wanted to go home. Not to my house but I wanted to go home. I’m talking about the place that I was made for, the place I was meant for. The place created for me – built for me with love and blood. The place that I realized…I long for. And it all started with a song:

Your letter said that you were leaving - but you didn't know how long
I have never stopped believing - That one day you would return

I hadn’t picked up this particular CD in years. I really didn’t care for it much after I bought it so I rarely listened to it. And I cared even less for this particular song. Normally I would “skip” through this song when it came on, but not today. Why I was now listening to this song was beyond me. Maybe that’s what it was: Maybe I had heard this song before but I had never listened until now. Regardless, I’m glad that I chose to listen today.

And though the waiting is the hardest - Part of everything I do
I do confess it's getting better - Knowing I will be with you

As I started listening to the words, I started to feel sad. You know how you feel when you miss someone really bad and you want to be with them but you can’t? That’s how I felt – I was sad because I missed my home. For about ten seconds I had this overwhelming feeling of wanting to be there – with Him. I also had feelings of sadness, separation, longing, expectation and happiness all rolled into one thinking about Home. It was almost to much - both my soul and eyes welled up thinking about it. At that moment, at that instance – I longed for home.

It's alright - It's okay - I won't worry about tomorrow
For it brings me one more day - Closer than I was to you

I do long for home, I also long for more. More than this world has to offer. More than sickness and pain. More than heartache and troubles. More is out there and it was speaking to me. It was letting me know to whom I belonged and where I belonged. More reminded me that I don’t belong here and I don’t belong to this world. The Bible says that He “Has set eternity in the hearts of men”. Frankly speaking that’s what I felt: eternity set on my heart. I felt eternity calling to me, reminding me of home. Calling me to where I belong. Calling me to More. It was like a summer breeze washing across my face. It was like catching a glimpse of something – you’re not sure what you saw but you know you saw something. It was like a gentle touch on the shoulder but you turn around and no one is there. You can’t see it but you can feel it and you know it’s there. You also know it’s real. That’s what I felt: the realization that eternity was reminding me my Father loves me and wants to be with me.

Now the question isn't "will you" - What I want to know is "when"
If it's one day or a million - I will wait for you 'til then

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a death wish. Actually I hope and pray that I have many more years here in this place. There is so much unfinished work - so much to yet see and do – I don’t want to leave just yet(Lord Willing). I want to see my kids finish school, fall in love and marry. I want to see them have children. I want become a grandparent. I want to retire and travel. And I want to grow old with my wife. There is so much that I want do that I don’t want to leave just yet. But I also want to go home. I know that day will come soon enough so I’m not rushing it. But home is calling me, reminding me that’s where I belong. Not here, this world is not my home.

So I'm holding on to your words - And the promises you've made
There is not one you have broken - There's not one I didn't take

So in the meantime, I'll keep living the life and I’ll keep looking towards home. I'll keep reading His letter and I'll keep clinging to His promises. I’ll also remember that home is out there – I won’t forget it. I can’t forget it. How can I? How can I forget what I was created for? How can forget my destiny? My destiny is to be with Him – forever. Home with my Father.

Your letter said that you were leaving - But you didn't know how long
I will never stop believing - I know one day you will return
It's alright - It's okay - I won't worry about tomorrow
For it brings me one more day - Closer than I was to you

Each day is one day closer to home...

"It's Alright" words and music by Third Day